'Glee'-cap: "The Hurt Locker: Part Two"

Raina Deerwater ‘16 / Emertainment Monthly Staff Writer

Jane Lynch in the Glee episode "The Hurt Locker: Part Two." Photo Credit: Jennifer Clasen/FOX.
Jane Lynch in the Glee episode “The Hurt Locker: Part Two.” Photo Credit: Jennifer Clasen/FOX.
It’s easy to understand how someone can be very busy. For example, someone running a show, and making all the very important creative decisions. It must be rough. Now imagine running two shows. Oh boy. We gotta cut this show runner some slack. This person could even get the two shows mixed up. How embarrassing! This is the only logical explanation for what happened on Glee this week. Ryan Murphy just forgot that it wasn’t American Horror Story. Yes, it all makes sense now, the creepy marionette puppet, the spying, the making people make out so they can survive, and the unavoidable uncomfortable gut feeling obtained at every plot point. Oh Ryan, you did it again. You goofed.
Honestly though, “The Hurt Locker: Part Two” may be have been the worst episode of the season, which truly is saying something. If you remember from Part 1, Sue (Jane Lynch) is determined to get Kurt (Chris Colfer) and Blaine (Darren Criss) back together at all costs. That’s not a hyperbole: she legitimately kidnaps the pair, and traps them in an elevator until they reconcile their feelings.  To convey this, she sends out a puppet of herself on a tricycle, telling them to make out or they are trapped indefinitely. Eventually they do, of course, and it’s shot as if it’s a romantic moment, and not something that falls under the legal definition of sexual assault. As per usual, Glee sees the line, crosses the line, and then runs so far past the line that we wonder if the line was ever really there at all.
Lea Michele and Becca Tobin in the Glee episode "The Hurt Locker, Part Two." Photo Credit: Beth Dubber/FOX.
Lea Michele and Becca Tobin in the Glee episode “The Hurt Locker, Part Two.” Photo Credit: Beth Dubber/FOX.
In other news there’s a glee club or something. The New New Directions have to get more members before they perform the next day at the invitationals. They must get 12 to compete. They end up only getting two more, gay football player (shocker) and this one girl named Kitty (Becca Tobin) who apparently was on the show last season. Kitty is such a fresh new take on previous characters on the show. It’s so refreshing how she has the personality of Santana (Naya Rivera) but the hairstyle of Quinn (Dianna Agron)! It’s like she’s almost a whole new character. The club is super happy with the addition of these two new crazy kids that they just forget they need six more members. And they win invitationals! Wow, with just a little pluck and light crime, these young talented kids might just be able to make it to regionals.
There was almost a nice moment, when Rachel (Lea Michele) watches her new club perform from the wings, feeling the satisfaction of a teacher. It would have been even nicer if the glee club had sounded less processed, or even if her co-coach was there. But he was too busy being kidnapped and manipulated. Happens to the best of us! Hopefully, next time the New Directions perform, Kurt will not be in mortal danger, but that’s a little too much to expect from 2015’s hottest new show: American Horror Story: Glee.
Overall Episode Grade: D-

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